Baby steps, grunts and loans

I'm a little overwhelmed by a couple of successes this week that feel really huge to me. I've been steadily learning about giftedness, still amazed and fascinated by the research and the plethora of resources.

As I've been learning I've been sharing the wealth, so to speak. Sharing information with our school system, principal, teachers, key support personnel. I've also brought in a few speakers. I've been urging the school, the board and the superintendent, and steadily making the case for it, for a professional development day about giftedness. Since NY doesn't require or fund any gifted programs, it's not been part of the degree program coursework for teachers and administrators to learn about these kids. And you know, the stereotypes are far from on target. New York, and six other states have turned a blind eye to the needs of these kids and instead foster an environment of learned underachievement.

I know I was zealous and aggressive when I started. My momma bear was out. My daughter was suffering and the teacher was not acting in the best interest of our daughter (understatement). It was horrible and frustrating and scary. And when we finally had her tested we were shocked by the results and felt completely lost. How could we possible ever know how to provide for her.

I knew that if I, as her parent felt this way, then her teachers didn't stand a chance. Not unless they had their own gifted kids or were themselves gifted kids who maybe had their needs met, were identified, but took an interest in the issues from a personal perspective. Like our elementary school Principal.

When I started on this journey a year ago March, my husband and I spoke out at a public forum board of education meeting about our differently wired children and our feelings of isolation. The audience asked us to go to administrators and were surpised at our response, we had, and were told that we would not be put in contact with other families like ours because then we would form a coalition and advocate for our kids.

I know it's a shocking thing to say to a parent. I wasn't upset from that stand point. I knew what he meant and that he just didn't yet know how to help us. We didn't know how to help us. We were desperate and lost and feeling helpless. (Here I have to thank Katie Augustyn of CT. Assoc. of Gifted Children for taking us by the hand and helping us!)

Last week I brought Nathan Levy to speak at our school. He's the third speaker I brought in since that time. We had a very good turn out. About 30 people. At least half were educators.
And Nathan was his usual brilliant self. At the end of the engagement I found out that the school was going to bring him back for a teacher professional development day!!!!

Big win #1

A day later I get an email from the same administrator who told us he wouldn't put us in touch with other parents. He sent me the name and phone number of a family who had just gotten the scores back on one of their children and were feeling a little lost. He asked me to call them and reach out to them.

Big win #2

You could have blown me over with a feather. I am so proud of the distance we have come, all of us. Our family certainly, but also our school has listened through resistance and come out the other side willing to learn and grow and excited by the possibilities. Me too! This is so huge!

I pushed and grunted. I bought and lent out books and borrowed from others in the field. And when I was feeling discouraged I kept taking baby steps.

I finally feel heard. And as a result I feel that as long as we have this principal, the kids are going to be okay, because their needs are going to start getting addressed.

I'm so grateful.